6 Handy Tips to Increase Fiber Intake in Your Routine Diet

“Health is the greatest wealth”

We all love our family. We want our loved ones to stay fit and healthy. Good nutrition and regular exercise are an important part of adopting a healthy lifestyle. We all know that making the right food choices can prevent many serious health problems such as obesity, heart disease, diabetes and cancer. Being a homeopathic physician and mum of two young kids, I believed in a concept of natural living, real food and a holistic approach to health care and I always try to find simple and smart ways to boost the nutritional value of the routine diet.

As a general rule, a healthy and balanced diet is a diet that contains the right amount of all the food groups.  It includes carbohydrate, protein, vitamin, minerals, fat and fibres inadequate amount. And we should always try to include these important nutrients in our routine diet for staying fit and healthy. But it is not as easy as it sounds.

During routine life, hectic work schedule and limited time are often creating a challenge for preparing a healthy and balanced meal.  Making a healthy and balanced meal for a limited time definitely requires a pre-preparation and some smart strategies’.  Sometimes, few simple but smart eating (and cooking) changes in our dietary habits, can optimise the nutritional value of our routine diet.

 Each nutrient in a balanced diet performs a distinct function and necessary for the proper functioning of our body.  Fibre is one of the most important nutritional element of a healthy and balanced diet. Consuming enough Fibres in your diet can have many health benefits.There are mainly two types of fibre:

Soluble fibre- it gets dissolve in the water easily and becomes a soft gel in the intestine. They help in lowering blood sugar level and cholesterol level. Oatmeal, apple, beans are the good source of soluble fibre.

Insoluble fibre- it remains unchanged and speeds up the food’s trip through the digestive system. They promote the bowel regularity and helps in the treatment of constipation. Wheat, whole grain, brown rice is the good source of insoluble fibre.

The daily recommended intake of fibre is 25-35 gram, but according to National Institute of Health, most of the people eat only 5-20 grams of fibre a day. And this reduced intake of fibre increases the risk of digestive disorders, diabetes and cardiovascular diseases. So it is best to make keep a watch on your diet and try to do some dietary changes to include the recommended portion of the fibre in your diet.

Here I am sharing some of my favourite and simple ways to boost the fibre intake in the routine diet.

Make a weekly menu planner- pre-preparation and menu planning is the first and best thing to make a healthy and balanced meal in limited time. I always prefer to sort out some healthy and quick recipes during a weekend for upcoming weeks. And try to select those recipes that cover the recommended daily requirement of each nutrient. With a little preparation, planning your meal in advance can help you eat a more nutritious and well-balanced diet during busy weekdays.

Shop smartly- smart shopping is my second important strategy to make a balanced meal.  It is the best way for providing safe and healthy food for your family. Usually, we tend to buy and eat same food products over and over again. And it may be a major cause of nutritional deficiency in our diet.

  So, I love to be a little adventurous for changing the settled routine. I always try to buy and eat the variety of fruits and vegetable. Read labels and select the appropriate product is another simple strategy that helps in healthy shopping. For example, try to find a cereal that contains at least 5 gram of fibre and tops it off with fruits and raisins is a good idea to add the fibre in routine breakfast. Here is a complete list for basic healthy shopping skill for proper guidance.

Start a main meal with a vegetable platter- this is another simple but effective way to include the more fibre in your routine diet. I always start my main meal with an attractive vegetable platter (preferably raw) with some healthy dressing. This step allows me to fill up sooner and help in eat less in the following meal. It is a simple way to maintain our vegetable (as well as fibre) requirement for the day. It helps in adding fibre in diet and also a great source for healthy weight management.

Healthy snaking with fresh fruits and dry fruit- I had observed that unhealthy and processed food snack is the major cause of unnecessary calorie intake and may cause obesity and metabolic disorders at the young age. Eating a nutritious and healthy snack can boost your daily intake of essential nutrients such as fibre and antioxidants. So I always try to eat whole fruit (without peeling) and dry fruits as a snack for getting the adequate fibre and nutritional benefits of fruits.

Replace the white bread and white rice with brown bread and brown rice- scientific studies suggested that brown rice and brown bread both are higher in the finest source of vitamin B-complex, fibres and proteins. While white bread and white rice made with the refined flours. Refined carbohydrates are low in essential nutrients and have been linked with the range of health problems such as diabetes, cardiovascular disorders and obesity. So why not replace the white bread and white rice with brown bread and brown rice? It will increase our fibre intake and help us feeling full for a longer period of time. 

Add beans to soups and stews- beans and legumes are one of the finest sources of fibre. Just 1 cup of cooked black beans offers 15 grams of fibre. Adding beans in soups and stew is an excellent way to boost the fibre intake. Do not afraid to be a little experimental while cooking.  To maintain the fibre intake, add beans in soups and stew is really an easy option. It tastes great; satisfy hunger and helps in a healthy weight management.

Here I love to share my breakfast menu with some simple changes and result is awesome by doing that.

Previous menu-

·         1 cup orange juice or apple juice= less than 1 gram fibre

·         1 cup cornflakes= 1 gram

·         1 slice white bread= 1 gram fibre

This breakfast provides me total less than 3 gram of fibre and as a result, I was not feeling well and then I had made some simple changes to make a high fibre breakfast and that is:

·         1 whole fruit of my choice (instead of fruit juice) = approximate 3-4 gram fibre

·         1 cup raisin bran= 8 gram of fibre

·         2 slices whole wheat bread with almond butter and fruit toppings- more than 10 gram of fibre

 And by doing these simple changes in my breast, I am on the way to meeting my fibre goal of 20-35 grams a day.

So these were the tiny steps to boost the fibre intake in routine diet. What is your secret ways to include the healthy ingredients in your routine diet, please share with us. Until then eat healthy and live well!

....And Then I had Lost the Most Precious Thing of My Life "My First Child"

  I am talking about simply being a mom. Being a mom is a gift that is unimaginably precious. It is a love that never dies; it is a relationship that never ends. Nothing else can produce the pure joy and satisfaction that motherhood allows. I think being a mom and enjoying the journey of motherhood is a dream of every woman. But for me, it has not been easy.

The whole journey begun 9 years ago, when I took a home pregnancy test on a Monday morning, it showed up positive.  And I had cried instantly as I was feeling overwhelmed with intense positive emotions. It was the happiest moment of my life. Within few minutes, all sorts of mixed feelings (excitement, nervousness) ran through my body. We (I and my husband) were very excited to find that we were expecting. This is the first grand baby for everyone in the family, on both sides. All family members were celebrating this great news. Everything was awesome.

Of course, being pregnant is the most beautiful time in life for any woman, when you shall fall in love with someone you have not met yet. And for me too, it was the most crowning creative experience of my life. It was the time of transition, growth and a profound beginning for me. The thought that I was carrying my baby was the greatest gift that I could have.

The actual joy of this amazing journey had begun when I heard a tiny heartbeat for the very first time. I still remember the day when I went down for my ultrasound and heard my baby's heartbeat; it was the most amazing feeling in the world. It gave me Goosebumps. I never want to forget how incredible it feels the first movement of the baby. I was wondering all the times, who is this person coming, 

growing, kicking, and turning inside me. The days were passing with the flying speed. Every day, when he kicks from the inside, I forget my all worries. He reminds me every time that a miracle was growing inside me. I was enjoying the each day with an impatient feeling that when will baby arrive?

Everything was smooth and normal. But, destiny has written something else for me.

  One day, my life turned upside down and everything was taken away from me in an instant.  I had something terrible that I would never have thought. Unfortunately, during the last week of the 6th month of my pregnancy, I had developed sudden and severe symptoms of pre-eclampsia with high blood pressure, bursting headache, swelling in limbs and protein in the urine.

 We rushed to the hospital and doctor says that we do not have anything better except bed rest and delivering the baby. He had prescribed me some medication and dietary modification. We were feeling helpless. All we wanted was a healthy baby. We had done every possible effort…frequent doctor visits, close monitoring, but nothing has worked out. The sudden rise in blood pressure has restricted the proper blood supply to the baby. The pain of dealing with knowing that my body is betraying me was difficult to share with anyone.  Initially, it was a case of intrauterine growth retardation (a condition when the foetus does not develop at a normal rate)…but within few weeks I had intrauterine death (death of baby inside the uterus) of my baby.

How could I forget that most unfortunate moment of my life, when the doctor came in and she had put the stethoscope on my belly like she had done thousand times before? She kept moving it and turned to me and said words that I shall never in my life time forget "there is not a heartbeat".  I was in a state of emotional shock.  I could not believe that we had lost our baby. Our first baby…our dream of being a parent unexpectedly shattered within few minutes.    I was living in the nightmare.

I was shocked and filled with so much emotional pain that was almost unbearable for me. I was going through the most difficult phase of my life. The emotional pain was infinitely more difficult to bear than the physical discomfort. I felt that I could not face going out. I had a deep feeling of failure inside me. A sense of guilt and self-blame were overwhelming me. I was feeling that my body had let me down. We both felt quite alone with a question why this was happening to us? Our whole family had a painful emotional outburst.

During those tough days of my life, I used to felt alone and depressed. Depression had drained my energy, hope and drive. Sometimes I sat down quite for hours and suddenly wept in next moment.  Even reaching out to close family members and friends was not easy for me. People surrounding me were consoling me constantly by saying the same thing “It is not your fault” “It is pure bad luck and unfortunate”. But I know it was not mere a bad luck.

After getting an initial physical and emotional recovery from my loss, I had realised very soon, that it was not only a routine case of pre-eclampsia. There is much more behind this unfortunate event and the fact that I had analysed were not only the shocking for me and my family…but frustrating as well.

I had realised that I was an innocent victim of “Medical Negligence”. During my pregnancy, I was under the strict medical supervision because of the previous history of miscarriages. In spite of that, I had a dreading complication of pre-eclampsia. I had suffered from medical negligence twice during my pregnancy period.

My doctor had not put an adequate attention to warning signs. He had not taken a proper action for protecting me and my baby at the time. And because of his negligence, I had the most traumatic experience of my life…losing my baby.

 Whenever, a doctor does a misdiagnosis, delayed diagnosis or delaying in treatment, these mal-practices always puts patient’s life in danger.

Of course, victims of medical malpractice and their families deserve an answer and a full accounting of what went wrong. It is very necessary if a loved one has passed on because of medical mal practice his family member should get justice for avoiding the future tragedies. Medical mal-practice is so threatening during pregnancy; it can have devastating and lifelong effects. It may be a cause of pre term labour, still birth or may cause the permanent defects in baby’s development.

 So as on my personal experience I had learnt that it is good to follow your doctor’s guidelines, but do not keep a blind trust. Always being self-aware, know the risk factors and preventive measures. Sometimes, their so-called busy-ness and negligence may put you in a deep trouble. And we may loss a precious thing that may be more precious than our life

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I had realised these all facts after losing the most precious thing of my life…my first baby. If I would not make a deep analysis of my pregnancy…I would think that pre-eclampsia was the only killer of my baby. But it was not…there was much more than that.

After learning a life lesson about the “being self-aware”, I had started my fertility treatment with positivity and optimistic approach. And with the grace of god my dream of being a mother came to reality after a brief period of waiting. After overcoming all obstacles, I become a mother of a healthy and beautiful daughter. The day when “my angel "came in our life I had the tear of happiness in my eyes and immense satisfaction in my heart. But I still had a silent grief of losing my first child. And I still had a strong anger for any kind of “medical negligence” that takes away so many precious lives just because of careless ness

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Do you have an experience like this? What else we can do to avoid “medical negligence”? Please share!

I had contributed this post firstly on  mycity4kids

Life in India Vs Life in USA

I think visiting a foreign country is the cherished aspiration of all individual and we were one of them. Being a software engineer, my husband has gotten a chance to complete a project in the USA. When he moved from India to the USA, I was in the India with kids to complete their exam sessions. Although my parents were with me at that time, but still it was the toughest time of my life.

After 3 months, we also get an opportunity to come to the USA. It was not an easy moment for me.  I was in the emotional ambivalence state. I was eager and excited to start a new venture, at the same time harbouring fears about not being able to complete it successfully had put me in a situation of emotional bipolarity.

At last, the moment came when we moved from India to the USA. I was immensely surprised by few things. My assumptions (like we all had about the USA) were absolutely true. The USA is filled with countless scenic and safe roads and a stunningly diverse range of beautiful landscape and climate. The roads are well-maintained and offer an extremely smooth ride. Great infrastructure and extraordinary neatness had grabbed my attention.

The most important thing that has impressed me is "organisational skills in each Task". They had courage, an imagination and an unbeatable determination to do their job at the best level. Their greatness lies in their ability to fix the faults. They express their faith in their country by working to improve it and that is truly exceptional and admirable. And we were also trying to learn the new ways of the country. The other thing that inspires me is the "study pace of life". Everything seems smooth and peaceful. From grocery mall to public transport, the gratitude and respect mutually illuminate one another. The days were passing with a flying speed and we were also involving in the new system. Then it was the time for starting of school for kids.

USA education system is a world famous and people from all over the world came here to pursue their educational dream. But if I share my honest opinion, firstly I was shocked with the certain things, like no books, no writing up to 5 years, and no pressurizing study schedule.

 Initially, my reaction was that oh!  It is so different because in India I have a strong focus on the academic subject and a strict routine study schedule for kids. But slowly I had observed that here schooling is more related to the learning, not with the marks and grades. They focus on overall development and exposure to latest technologies. my preschooler's first topic at preschool was how to control your negative emotions (anger) had surprised me. Kids also get started to enjoy their school routine.

In between , we moved from California to Connecticut (California has a stable weather but Connecticut is well-known for severe snowfall and extreme cold weather). In Connecticut, when the weather changed after the month of September. The sudden drop in temperature and cold breezy air has restricted our outdoor life. We get trapped inside it was not easy for kids too. They had no outdoor activities; electronic gadgets are the only source of entertainment. In India, we had a normal life throughout the year. But here playing outside, park visit, shopping, and social gatherings all routine activities affected badly because of extremely cold weather. We were missing India so much. This was the first "F"- "Feel good weather" that has made us nostalgic.

The family is the most important thing which we missed here. I cannot express my feeling in words, that how much I missed my parents. Every day I missed the each moment of togetherness. I used to meet my parents 3-4 times in a year. We celebrate festivals, spend holidays (like all other people) and had enough fun in life. Here I missed all those tiny moments. This year on Rakhi, I had cried the whole day for my brother. During Diwali celebration, I had missed my all friends and family so much. But here is no variation in routine life. All days are same, no social gatherings. The "Family" is the second "F" that makes me homesick every day.

The third "F" is "Food…The tastiest Indian food". Although Indian grocery store is available here (but only one) and we can get all routine household items. But there is a restriction and bounded feeling. We are completely foodie when it comes to Indian street food (pani- Puri, pav-bhaji, Vada- pav). Our taste buds are craving for this tastiest food. We are missing those routine spicy street foods which we usually enjoyed after shopping. We are the board from the blend foods that served here.

The fourth "F" is "Faithful maids" which we are missing here. We Indian used to have a household maid in each house since childhood. And I was also one of them. But here is no maid system. You need to do your all household by yourselves in each circumstance. Sometimes, when I am sick and I see a whopping pile of laundry and dishes, I missed my all faithful maids (Vidhya, Sunita, and Pushpa) the most.

The last "F" is the "Friendly neighbourhood". In India, we all have a neighbourhood connection and friendly neighbourhood is a treasure in our life. Kids also had good neighbourhood friends. They used to enjoy their routine play time and vacations with fun. But here life is mechanical and more practical. To find a friendly neighborhood indeed….a daunting task here.

So these were my experience when we moved from India to the USA. We had completed 1.5 years here. Although the USA is one of the most developed countries in the world and people think that it is a privilege to stay here. And we are also enjoying our life here, but my heart and innermost feeling always say that "East or west, India is the best".

Simple activities for intellectual and mental development in kids

" Children are like wet cement, whatever falls on them makes an impression."- Haim Ginott
.
Very well said by respected Haim. childhood phase has long term impact on our life. scientist say 95% of human brain development occur during first 5 years of life. good parental care and home atmosphere is must for proper mental and intellectual development of kids.
1- Good memory and concentration
2-Confidence and courage
3- Decision making
4- Leadership quality
5- Communication skill
6- Proper behavior in different situations
7- Compromise and collaboration

These are some basic intellectual qualities that promotes proper mental development. here i am sharing  some simple activities and projects that will encourage the intellectual development.

A- Organize a family interview- organize a family interview event is a wonderful idea for developing communication skill and confidence building. by this way kids will remove fear of public speaking.
Method- Explain your child that he will be anchor of this event. And he need to prepare some interview questions about any family member .(father or grand father)
I am sure your kid and all family members will be excited for that event. Great fun with Great creativity and learning. you may shoot a video for more fun.

B- Complete the story game- It is another interesting activity to enhance imagination power in kids. it may be done  among family members or in group of kids.
Method- One person will start a narration of a story, but only one line. than second person will say second line and so on---- by this way with the help of all members a new and interesting story will form. this activity will explore imagination and thinking process in kids.

C- Organize a family seminar- organize a family seminar with a specific theme is a wonderful way to develop confidence and stage presence in kids.
Method- select a theme like My favorite animal or fruit for smaller kids and My favorite leader or sport for older kid. ask your child to prepare a speech on that topic. they may use flash cards to make this activity interesting. on event evening one person will be anchor, other one is judge. encourage your child to speak confidently on their subject. help them if they forgot and reward them for good performance.

D- Extempore- it is a classic competition that usually organized in schools and college, why not try this at home? put slips of different subject in a bowl. ask kids to pick slips one by one and tell them to speak spontaneously on that subject. it is an amazing activity for decision making and thought process.

Kids are innocent learner. we can work on their thinking process at early age with simple projects.

1- Inexpensive wall art- for that first you need to select a theme. we had select a theme called " WE LOVE" and asked kids what they love and what they like? it is a simple question to start thinking process in kids, even preschooler can answer that, like all other kids they answered we love chocolate, ice-cream, cup-cakes..etc.

Material needed- old magazine, scissor, glue and a lots of creativity.

Method- cut the pictures of all things that kids love from a old magazine and pasted it on the wall in a artistic manner. your inexpensive wall art is ready.

It was a cool activity with learning.

2. Every day diary writing-Creativity is a great quality which promotes emotional, cognitive and mental development in kids. writing, drawing, painting, crafting are good choices for exploring creativity and imagination power in kids.
It was a weekend afternoon and we want to do something new and creative. so we had started a new project.

Project name: Everyday diary, it is a simple craft which help kids to develop writing skills at an early age.
Theme and basic idea: Firstly i had explained them importance of writing a everyday diary. we had some special (or not so special) moment everyday. you need to write down it on a paper with a drawing and we will punch this paper in your everyday dairy.
Material needed- Plain drawing sheet of any color, we had taken red one.
-scissor
-Glitter pen, decorative material (optional)
- Yarn or punching material.

Method- cut the sheet in required size with the help of scissor .
-Write down everyday experience on a sheet of paper.

-Decorate the cover of diary with drawing. you may use decorative material (lace, stones etc) for that purpose.
-Everyday diary a super easy craft is ready.

So it was another activity for intellectual development.
It was my little steps for kids to encourage them mental development. What's your do not forget to share with me.

7 Life Lessons That I had Learnt from "Danial Tiger Neighbourhood"

Of course, being a parent is a precious gift of god. It is a unique feeling when we love somebody else wholeheartedly and unconditionally for eternity. Nothing else can produce the true joy and satisfaction that motherhood allows. It is the greatest thing that I have ever felt.

It can be the most rewarding and satisfying job in the world, but sometimes, it can be the most exhausting and daunting too. Especially the first few years of childhood are very crucial for their development. The relationship and environment they occupied during these years shape the way they learn and grow. And as a parent also, it is not easy. We always had multiple parental responsibilities and duties. We always concerned about their well-being and overall development.

It is an always a matter of concern that how to build good emotional and social skills in our kids? How to support language and intellectual development? And apart from that develop a proper sequence of routine chores is an additional (but vital) responsibility for us. Routine helps them get through the things that need to be done each day. From brushing teeth, healthy food habits,  get up in the morning and going to bed at the time, potty training and list is going on.

 Sometimes, these parental responsibilities put a heavy pressure on us. We feel helpless and frustrated. We need a friend or helper to share our responsibilities. And the good news is that…I had found a good friend to help us. He is cute, adorable…our kids loved him and most importantly he teaches all good things to our kids in the easiest way.

Yes! I am talking about our very own Danial tiger. I am sure, if you have a toddler or pre-schooler in your home, you know him too.  My 4-year daughter loves "Danial tiger's neighbourhood". She is a big fan of Danial and his cute, adorable friends (o the Owl. Katerina kitty cat, prince Wednesday…and many more). And the best part is that the show is not only entertaining for her but teaching her so many good things as well.

Danial tiger's neighbourhood is an American-Canadian animated series produced by the Fred Roger's Company. The program is targeted at preschool children. The show involves the story of the 4-year-old tiger, his family and neighbourhood friends. Each episode has a story that involved with a catchy song and helps kids learn and repeat the concerned subject. It is the great tool for teaching kids social, emotional skills, routine tasks and activities.

 The series has covered almost all general topics such as safety rules, picky eating, potty training, the first day of school, hospital visit…and so on. And most interestingly each theme is covered with a beautiful catchy tune and song. Even adults also loved it. These songs work like a magic in the difficult situation.

I still remember an amazing experience when we went to a restaurant for dinner and kids were getting impatient because of delaying in the food service. They were in the mood of throwing the tantrums. And suddenly I had an idea that inspired from the show and when we had sung.

"When you wait you can play, sing or imagine anything…"

The song had changed their mood instantly and we had enjoyed our dinner peacefully.

Apart from teaching kids and solving their problems Danial tiger has helped me a lot. Yes! Even though it is a pre-school children series but sometimes as an adult, we also need a gentle piece of advice and reminder for our all mistakes. These are some of my favourite life lessons that I had learnt from this cute show.

Anger management

As a mom, "Anger" is a common negative emotion that we all had time to time. Whenever I felt overloaded with endless responsibilities my patience gets lost and I felt an outburst of anger very easily. It is all right to express your emotions, but it should be in a healthy manner and should not affect our kids. So when I had heard,

"When you feel so mad, and want to roar takes a deep breath and count to 4…."

Really this song works for me. Nowadays, whenever I had an out bursting of negative emotions. I get started to sing this song…and my temper gets cool down within few minutes.

Self-Care

This is also one of the most important aspects of our life. Proper self-care is vital for dealing the enormous pressure of parenting. But unfortunately, most of us parent forget to do that.  Even during sickness we did not take care of our body properly and tend to get focused on completing our responsibilities. The song,

"When you sick…..Rest is best, rest is best…." is the best reminder for us? And now when I get sick, I rememorize the advice "Rest is best". And this great advice helps me a lot to get a faster recovery.

Feel good

As a human, we are "Fault finder" by nature. We easily get anxious, nervous and worried about smallest things. During everyday life, simple chores like cooking a food….to complete an assignment bother us. And we had a bad feeling regarding our life instantly.  But the song,

"When something feels bad, turn it around and find something good" motivate us magically.

 Now, whenever I feel low and depressed, I try to turn it around….and really I feel good.

Take help

As a grown-up being ego-centric is a common occurrence. We all had different problems in our lives but often hesitate to ask for help. We feel frustrated but we hide our feelings. But the song,

"When you feeling frustrated, take a step back and ask for help….." remind us gently that we all need help. It is good for our physical, mental and emotional health.

 Now, whenever I feel frustrated I would love to share my feelings and ask for help.

Empathy

Empathy is an emotion that is almost forgotten nowadays. We need to be empathetic. It is an essential quality that should be a part of our system. The song,

"Think about what someone else is feeling…." Remind us about empathy beautifully.

Anxiety

As a parent and as an individual too, we often had a tendency to get anxious and nervous. Sometimes, we did not observe the whole thing and make a preconceive notion of tension and anxiety. The song,

"See what it is, you might feel better, see what it is you might not feel afraid…." Remind us that we should try to observe the thing or situation first, Instead of being afraid.

 It relieves our anxiety and tension instantly.

Express yourself

We lived in high tech and fast phased world. Hectic lifestyle, tight work schedule, endless household chores create a sort of frantic tension in our everyday life. Sometimes, these pressurising responsibilities create a misunderstanding between family members. It is vital to express our love and care for our dear ones to maintain a healthy and happy family atmosphere. The song,

"Find the way to say I love you…" is really a great reminder for us to express our love and care.

 It is a moment of celebration when we had "WE LOVE EACH OTHER" feeling in our home.

These are just a few examples. There are so much more that are truly a source of inspiration and motivation for anyone. It offers a bunch of joy and treasure for happiness in most acceptable and easiest way. I had a great motivating and relaxing experience while rememorizing these simply precious thoughts. Do you have any learning experience with kids or their activities? Please share with us. Until then Happy Parenting!

"Take Care"- A Heart-Rending Story of Every Dedicated Mom

It was Sharda's fourth surgery in the last 4 year. She was lying down in the hospital bed with an expressionless face. Grey hair, sunken eyes, wrinkled face……she was looking more shell-shocked than usual. She was trying to hide her injured soul with a fake beautiful smile.

"Surgery will be a complicated one. She is allergic to antibiotics and had asthma since 10 years; we need to take an extra care during and after surgery." Doctor's anxious voice has awakened her from a half sleepy state.

"All right doctor, we will do that" her father in law has said in a sympathetic tone.

But as soon as the doctor left the room, their sympathetic tone has changed into an angry voice. "It is your entire fault. We are tired from your sickness.

 "Why do not you take care of yourselves?" they asked her with a frustrating tone of voice.

She has not answered them, but millennial memories flashed through her mind. She was recalling all those moments that has changed her life forever. It was 25 years ago when she got married. She had a complete transformation from a pampered girl to a "responsible bahu". She has remembered that she was feeling overwhelmed with a sudden pressure of responsibilities. She missed the comforting presence of her parents all the time. She was trying to fulfil their demands and expectations with best efforts. From early morning to late night a long never ending list of household tasks exhausted her completely. In spite of her best efforts, whenever she commits a tiny mistake, they complained bitterly.

"Why do not you do anything properly" to "your mom did not teach you anything". These kinds of conversation were usual for her.

She knew that overload of responsibilities ruining her health. It seriously wounded her self-feeling and unconsciously led her to overreact in a constant psychological pressure. Her confidence has shaken by this family stress. She had lost 10 kg weight during the first year of her married life. She knew that,

"She should take care of her selves. And she has tried to do that. But……"

"Aunty please takes this medicine" by hearing nurse's voice she returned to the present moment. She was feeling that world keep pilling the troubles and sickness on top of her and suddenly bunches of neighbours (mostly females) appeared in her room. After a formal greeting, very soon they had started the usual but annoying conversation.

"Oh! Again a surgery" one has said.

"It is fourth one right" next, has said.

And lastly, almost in a synchronised tone they had said: "Why do not you take care of yourselves".

This time, Sharda was feeling a little more upset, again the past memories of old days began to flood back into her mind. She had remembered when she was struggling with her physical condition after 2 miscarriages. These so-called neighbouring well-wishers always make taunt on her,

"Now, your marriage has been more than 2 years old. We all are still waiting for good news from you". A constant pressure from society and family for having a baby was disturbing her life. She has done all efforts to being pregnant. From intrusive testing to high dose medication, she has tried every possible thing. She knew her physical condition is not good. She needs a break from this stress.

She aware that "before being a mom, she should take care of her selves. But….."

"It is dinner time mam" And your kids are waiting to meet you. A sudden voice of housekeeper brings back her in the present. "Oh! My kids, Sagar and Somya, I want to meet them right now. She breaks down into tears as she has hugged her kids.

"I was waiting for both of you since morning" she has said with an optimistic approach.

"Yes! Mom, we are also worried about you. Why this is happening again and again". And after some time she has received the same piece of advice. "Why do not you take care of yourselves", this time, she was completely shuttered with the statement. She had thought that kids would understand her pain, her emotions, but…..

The earliest cherished memories to the toughest moment of motherhood crawled in her mind. How she can forget that after a long fertility treatment when she became a mom of her pretty princess somya, it was the happiest moment of her life, and very soon with the grace of god Sagar has borne. It was the happiest but most challenging time of her life. She was deeply engaged in their care. Their education, their health…and never-ending responsibilities of being a mommy of two young kids was not easy for her. In between, she had her first asthma attack. The attack was severe, she had decided to take a natural therapy for that, but it requires her to stay their centre for a while.

"No, mom it is our exam time. You cannot go anywhere. You had to stay with us." She had cancelled her all treatment plans after hearing their just one innocent request. Then so many times she plans a diet and exercise schedule for her health, but every time her responsibilities create an obstacle in her path.

"Mom, please help me in this assignment"

"Mom, please cook something new"

And never ending demands and expectation was putting a pressure on her health. She always prefers her duties, her responsibilities above than her selves. She never had any regrets and she felt an immense sense of satisfaction and joy of completing her responsibilities very well. But today she was feeling alone, very alone….

"Sharda, it is time to go in O.T. are you ready?" this time, Suresh (Her husband) has aroused her from the past memories.

"Hu…you will not tell me, something" she has asked him.

"Do not get afraid, everything will be fine" he had consoled her.

She was feeling a bit of relaxation, but within few minutes when she was ready to enter in O.T., she has heard the agonising words,

"Are! Bhai whole day, household tasks….she did not take care of her selves" Suresh was saying the same thing to his elder brother.

It was the most panic moment for Sharda. She has been tolerating lots of mental and physical torture for many years. She has done lots of sacrifices for her husband and family. Economic pressure or losing his job, she has helped him in each and every moment of life. She has always given an unconditional love and care to him. Whenever he wants something, she was ready to give him under any situation. Since morning, when her in-laws, neighbours, relatives….even her own kids had disappointed her. She had thought her "life partner" would be the only person, who will understand her situation. Who will understand the real reason, why she wouldn't be able to take care of her selves? But unfortunately, nobody was with her.

 She was feeling isolated, she was feeling lonely…

The story is a work of fiction but inspired by a true incidence. It could be a story of my mom, your mom or in future it could be a story of me or you or any mom who loves her family, who always put her responsibilities above than her selves. Who sacrifices her own wishes, happiness….even her health. And at the end, what does she get? The story has two ends, I was confused. Please help me and vote for the preferable option.

Climax 1- Sharda is waiting for the surgeons on the operation table. She had numerous thoughts in her mind. The first time, she is feeling a complete regret for what she has done in her life. She is rethinking why she has always put her responsibilities above than her selves. Why was she not selfish? Today, she has got nothing except advices, except the disheartening thoughts that why she has not taken care of her selves? She has only a deep regret in her heart and tears in her eyes.

Climax 2: As soon as Sharda entered into operation theatre, first her father in law realised his mistake. He regrets I should not talk with her in that way. She has taken care of all of us for so many years. He has said to Suresh, "Yes papa, it was not the time for offering the advice, she needs our love and affection". In next room, Somya and Sagar were talking the same thing. "Mom has done lots of sacrifices for our education, for our demands" this time it is our duty to take care of her. Now they all are realising the fact,

"Why she wouldn't be able to take care of her selves"

Now, they all made a promise to each other, they will give her a much deserve respect, love and care.

the article appears first on Mycity4kids.

Some "Super Easy strategies" to Reduce "Family Financial Stress"

Parenting is a hilarious journey filled with multiple responsibilities. Family life has changed dramatically in last few years.  Parenting is seen as more difficult today than in the past. Even the basic tasks of feeding, clothing, protecting and educating kids seem harder. And the most difficult part of parenting is handling the “financial responsibilities”.

 Financial stress is one of the most concerning aspects of our life. Sometimes, as a parent, it is difficult to manage our expenses on a budget. So, what can we do to reduce the “financial stress”? What should be our strategies to avoid the unnecessary tensions?

Of course, pre-preparation is the must for the best result. And adopting a frugal and economic approach is the answer to our all financial worries. I think it does not matter whether you earn more or less, but keep an economical approach towards our expenses helps us in reducing financial stress. Definitely, living a frugal life requires certain lifestyle changes and a conscious awareness about how we are spending and saving money? My idea of thrifty living comprises basic three principle

• ·         Smart shopping
• ·         Use appropriately and waste less
• ·         Save in advance

Smart shopping- shopping is a routine life activity. We buy stuff which we want and which we need. But the majority of people shop impulsively and buy stuff neither need nor want. If we want to make smarter buying decisions and want to save a good amount of money, it is best to pre-plan your shopping and use some money saving strategies. Here I am sharing my ideas about smart shopping.

Make a shopping list 1-2 days prior to shopping- usually, we all prepare a shopping list before shopping and buy listed items. But I think it is a clever idea to prepare a shopping list at least 1-2 day prior to shopping and recheck it after some time and make an analysis about items which we really needed. Cut the unnecessary items from existing list. I am sure we will find some items (That are not absolutely necessary) and would be able to save a handsome amount of money by doing just a rechecking.

Proper research – it is best to do a proper in- depth research prior to shopping. Always compare prices and maintain a price book for the best result. Try to find alternative shopping options (such as a thrift store, yard or garage sale) and select the needed items appropriately. If possible try to arrange a shopping pool with family and friend to shop sales for each other. One important thing, it is not possible that one particular store has the lowest price on all items, so check the different stores for particular offers and sales on different items.

Keep an eye for discounts, sales and offers – it is another good way for smart shopping. Heavy electronic items, clothes, jewellery, may put an extra pressure on your routine budget. It is best to wait for some time and buy them at the time of discount. But avoid over-enthusiastic approach at the time of sales. Usually, we buy unnecessary items at the time of sales and forget to check actual necessity and quality of an item. Be calm and patient. Analysed your actual requirement and quality of products (because sometimes clearance products had poor quality) and then buy the stuff.

Use all buy stuff appropriately- sometimes we buy stuff impulsively, but forget to use it during hectic routine life. It is completely a waste of money, time and efforts which we had invested at the time of buying. So do not forget to use all buy stuff appropriately. In the same way, it is equally important to do a proper maintenance of all buy stuff. A proper care may increase the life of expensive products. For example, An expensive blanket requires a proper washing and handling. If we follow all essential steps of proper care we would be able to use it for years.

Save in advance- we all prefer a monthly budget to organise our income and expenses. Usually, expenses are higher than the fixed budget and we would not able to save effectively. But if we save a fixed amount of money in the advance, it will reduce our tensions and anxiety and we would be able to enjoy our expenses and routine life more freely.

Apart from these 3 basic strategies, there are some lifestyle hacks that can help us to get more thrifty fun.

Plan weekend ahead- generally, weekend entertainment expenses cost a lot and put a huge pressure on our routine budget. Try to set an alternate pattern of paid and unpaid activities and events for the weekend. Park visits, free educational events, are the great way to enjoy the weekend at no cost. Also, limit the dining out to once in a month or at the special occasion. Instead of that do a pre-preparation and menu planning for the weekend during weekdays to enjoy a less expensive and healthy meal with family.

Try to adopt a healthy lifestyle for you and your family- eat healthy and exercise regularly will help you to stay healthy and fit. Avoid the use of a vehicle for a shorter distance. It will reduce your medical expenses, fuel bills and junk food expenditures.

Recycling- recycling is my favourite thing to living a frugal life. It is a great habit to save energy, environment and money. It gives an immense pleasure and satisfaction when we convert a trash into a treasure with our creativity and imagination. I always prefer to have the separate recycling bin for different items. We put separately each item in the different bin according to a category. (For example use separate bin for old clothes, tin can, cardboards) and select an individual theme for each month or week. Involved your kids during decluttering and recycling and teach them a good habit with creativity and imagination. Thrifty fun is an extra benefit of recycling.

I believe by applying this simple strategies we can reduce “family financial stress”. It may be the easiest way for “parenting in budget”. These were my ideas to live a frugal life with thrifty fun. But always remember do not over stress on frugality; try to adopt it in a fun and creative way. What is yours? Please share with us.

The day I had realized that "My Dad Is My whole world"

We all love holidays. Holidays means a true spirit of joy, fun, celebration and togetherness. It brings an immense pleasure in our life and we all eagerly waiting for it for all year along. It is the easiest way for most of the people for pursuing happiness in their lives. But sometimes, the holidays are not so jolly at all. In fact, they create memories that are so scary…even they hurt deep in the side the heart after passing the long years.

I also had a heart-rending experience during the “Holiday season”. It was 5 years ago when I was expecting my second baby. And as usual, we had been enjoying the pleasant holiday season, with friends, family. And this year “waiting for the arrival of new baby” was the most exciting thing for us. Good friends, family and most importantly “My parents” were the most integral part of my life. Everything was smooth and awesome. It was 2 days after the “Christmas” celebration; I was alone in my house (my husband was out of town). It was 11 p.m.  And suddenly a call arrived with an annoying consistency; a shrill ring has waked me up from blissful slumber. It was my mom’s call. 

She said,

“Sweetie  ...papa had some health issues…and the doctor had recommended some tests. But do not worry, everything is fine”. She was sounding very low.

But as I had a highly emotional equation with my mom, I have realised one thing instantly that “Everything is not fine” and decided to go for my native place as early as possible. I had packed my bags haphazardly and took the earliest possible bus with my little 3-year-old doll. It was the most wrenching journey of my life that I have ever done. Physically as well as mentally. I had felt an unaccountable sense of fear and anxiety. A strong feeling of apprehension, restlessness and a persistent thought that “something bad is going to happen” were overwhelming my mental and physical status. Any how I had reached my native place and got a temporary sense of relief after hugging my papa.

After that we had wasted no time getting to the hospital. Within few hours of arrival and after completing certain test doctor had provide us a complete diagnosis with some scary words,

“It is a straightforward case of myocardial infraction (Heart attack). As your father is diabetic that’s why he had not got any typical acute symptoms (pain in chest, unconsciousness) except some mild digestive symptoms. He had explained angioplasty and by-pass surgery as a treatment option with all possible pros and cons.”

Doctor’s verdict shatters our sense of well-being and security within few minutes. We were trying to rationalise what happened? Why happened? It was a feeling that left us emotionally damaged. It took a while to get over the pain and feel safe again. For moving ahead and making a correct choice regarding further treatment, I had called my little brother. 

Within few hours, he was also with us.

We all had intense and really big scary emotion (fear, anxiety, frustration), but we all were trying to retreating ourselves to avoid a dialogue that might end up making feel us worse. We were concealing our emotional fragility from each other with the fear that exposing it would make us look weak and helpless. We were trying to hide our fear and emotional pain from each other constantly. And while doing that, we had barely said two words to each other.

We moved from one clinic to another for confirming the diagnosis and selecting the best treatment. And after two days, we had selected “Angioplasty” as a preferred treatment option. Next day, we were in the hospital.

Doctors were busy in the pre-operative preparations. Very soon, papa was dressed in the hospital gown. He was looking very comfortable with a peaceful smile on the face (that he always had). He had not wanted his pain and struggle to make him like victim. And we all were trying again to control our emotions (fear, anxiety) forcefully. Doctors took him in to operation room within few minutes. As soon as he left the room, our heart gets broken so badly. 

This time we wouldn’t be able to control our emotions any more. We (mom, Bhai and I) cried simultaneously with a deep pain inside the heart. We all had thousands of memories of being together as a family. His love, support, care….cannot explain in words get rememorized in few seconds. We were earnestly doing a prayer for his well-being. We just want a divine protection and provision for a successful surgery. We had only a single emotion that we need him…we would be last without him.

Whenever our dear one has an illness that could be life threatening and when we lived in the uncertainty of not knowing whether he would survive or not…is the most unfortunate situation to deal with. It felt unreal and we just want that it is only a nightmare.

It took almost 7 days from making a diagnosis then surgery and lastly the post-operative measures. But those 7 days were the most difficult, most complicated days of my life. I never want to feel the intense agony, the emotional pain of “those 7 days” again in my life. And wish no-body has those circumstances when they had a fear of losing to their dear one even for a moment.

We were waiting impatiently outside the operation theatre for doctors. We just want to listen that “surgery is successful, everything is fine”. And god was kind to us, within few time doctor came and said, “Do not worry, everything is fine”. Your father gets discharged within 2 days.

With the grace of god, papa got a faster recovery. He was feeling well physically as well as mentally…and so that we also. Now,

The long 5 years had passed. And we again had a loving peaceful family life. After that incidence I had realised the true depth of relationship in life. After that incidence, I want to enjoy each and every tiny moment of togetherness with family. Everything is fine…. But still I could not forget “those 7 scary days of holiday”. It was those days when I had realised that “My father is my whole world”

“Life is so short. We all love our family, but sometimes minor family conflicts; misunderstandings spoil the true joy of our relationships. We used to behave mostly ego-centric with a persistent feeling only of oneself, without regard for the feelings or desires of other. We think that “I am always right”, and while flowing with these ego-centric emotions we forget to enjoy the most beautiful gift of god (our family, our relationships) so,

“Love your family, spend time, be kind, serve one-another, make no room for regrets. Because tomorrow is not promised and today is very short”.

What are your thoughts? Do you have any experience like this? Please share with us.

Homeopathy for kids

This post first appears on mycity4kids

Homeopathy is an alternative branch of medical science that works on the basic principle of "similia similibus curenter" means like cures like. And as a certified Homeopathic physician, I always love to share the goodness of Homeopathy with others.

I want to share a memorable incidence that happened just a few months ago. It was 1 A.M. and suddenly a call arrived with an annoying consistency, a shrill ring in the middle of the night woke me up from the blissful slumber. It was one of mine close friend. Her voice was husky. "My 6-month baby is crying continuously since 4 hours because of infantile colic." She has said in a low voice.

 They had tried all well-known home remedies, but nothing is working. She needs my help and I was there within few minutes. I had observed that baby was screaming with extreme irritability and anger and on the basis of his individual symptoms, I had given him few tiny globules (small pills) of Chamomilla 30 and within few minutes, the baby has stopped crying and fell into the sleep peacefully. As a first time parent, they were amazed at such a great result within the shortest span of time and with tiny globules. They asked me, how you have done this miracle? And I had answered them, it is not mine, it is a homoeopathic miracle. It always happened when a properly selected individualised medicine is prescribed on the basis of symptom similarity.

My friends were little confused with my homoeopathic language. But they want to know more about the goodness of homoeopathy. How is it work? Why is it a preferable treatment option for kids? I think, as a parent we all are always concerned about our child's complete health (physical, mental, social and emotional). We want to keep them away from unnecessary medications.

By the way, back to the story, I had tried to explain all queries of my dear friends. Their first question was,

How does Homeopathy work?

Homeopathy works on the principle of symptom similarity. It means when a person suffering from a certain disease, a qualified homoeopathic physician collect his all symptoms in detail. Then he matches the narrated symptoms with a medicine with the help of Materia Medica (homoeopathic therapeutic book) and then best selected remedy (the medicine that matches with disease person's symptom) is prescribed. When the properly selected remedy is prescribed in perfect dose and potency an Ideal cure happened.

My friends find it interesting and asked me a common question that most people asked. Why homoeopathic cases taking take so much time (up to 1 hour) and why homoeopaths collect all other symptoms (apart from disease) in detail?

Basic Homeopathic case-taking and theory of individualization

Yes! It is true that homoeopathic case taking is a time-consuming process. And it requires a proper time and patience. Because homoeopathy works on the principle of "Individualization", in simple words each individual is a unique person and so their disease too. When a person suffers from a disease it is compulsory to collect his all symptoms. It includes his physical general (thirst, appetite, sleep, dream) mental general (anger, sadness) and after a proper collection and evaluation, an individual remedy is prescribed.

Oh! That was the reason behind that detailed case-taking. They exclaimed. But now we want to know why it is a preferable and best treatment option for kids.

Although there are several good reasons that why homoeopathy is the best treatment option for kids. But I am explaining top 7 reasons why it is best?

Here is why homoeopathy is the best treatment option for kids?

Homeopathic medicines are safe, gentle, and non-toxic and had no adverse side effects

The first and most important reason is that Homeopathy is the safest mode of treatment and kids deserve safe medicines. Even these medicines are safe to use in very young (new-born and infant) babies. When we used conventional medicines they cause unwanted side effects. For example, diarrhoea is a common side effect of antibiotics and over the counter cough and cold medicines causes' drowsiness. Nowadays we parents are concerned about the side effects of conventional drugs. In this scenario, homoeopathy is a wonderful treatment option. These medicines cure diseases in most gentle and safe manner, without any harmful side effects.

"Homeopathy cures a greater percentage of cases than any other method of treatment. Homeopathy is the latest and refined method of treating patients economically & non-violently"- Mahatma Gandhi.

Cures a disease from the root and gives long lasting to permanent cure

 The second reason is when we choose the conventional mode of treatment; these medicines kill the causative organism of diseases (bacteria, fungus etc.).For example, antibiotics used in bacterial infections and antifungal are useful for fungal infections. And by this method, they try to make our body disease free.  In other words, there is suppression of symptoms occur, but according to homoeopathic principle individual remedy is selected according to individual symptoms of the sick person. For example, if a person is suffering from cold and flu, in the conventional method, treatment option is same for all diseased people, but in homoeopathy, a qualified homoeopath will record all detail individual symptoms of the disease. For example character of nasal discharge, aggravating and ameliorating factors, other concomitant symptoms, mental and physical general symptoms and after collecting these symptoms an individual similimum (most similar) remedy is prescribed. And this indicated remedy acts on individual symptoms and cures a disease from the root. This is the ideal method of curing a disease and best suitable for kids.

Easily acceptable and tolerable treatment option especially for kids

 We all know that children often resist taking conventional drugs. They show tantrums and get irritated by conventional medicines, but homoeopathic medicines are administered in the form of the tiny sweet globule. Kids accept it very well, even they loved it.

It Increases immunity and resistance power of body naturally

 The prominent reason, it increases immunity and resistance power. According to homoeopathic principle, when a person suffers from any disease his vital force (resistance power) get deranged. When an indicated homoeopathic medicine is administered it acts on the vital force of the body and make it stronger. Then this stronger vital force eliminates the disease force. Thus, our inner resistance power is increased. Kids have the delicate immune system so for them; it is an excellent method of curing a disease.

It does not interfere with other medications and can be easily used with other therapies

 It is a common question that does homoeopathic remedies can be used with other medication. It is true that Homeopathic medicines are believed to be safe when used with other medicines. Although homoeopathic remedies should not replace conventional treatment for serious health concerns, but they can be used as an alternative option. For example, in the case of asthma in kids, it is necessary to use conventional inhalers and other indicated medicines. But we can add indicated homoeopathic medicine along with them. When indicated medicine will start work on individual symptoms (it may take a time and patience is required) then the dose of conventional medicines can be tapered gradually. After a period of time patient can control his disease with homoeopathic remedy only.

A good option for at-home treatment

 Because it is a gentle, safe and permanent mode of treatment and its method of dispensing medicine is also very simple. So after learning some basic principle every mom can use it at home for treatment of common childhood problems. But for serious health concern, medical supervision is compulsory.

It can be used for acute and chronic conditions

Childhood is the most sensitive and fundamental phase of life.  Millions of children in the world have some form of chronic diseases. In this case, homoeopathy works like a miracle in both acute and chronic diseases. In acute disorders(like common cough-cold and fever) acute remedies work rapidly with good success and in the case of chronic diseases (where symptoms are less severe than acute disease, but they can affect seriously affect the quality of life and may worse over the time) well selected constitutional remedies may provide significant relief.

Last but not the least homoeopathic remedies are typically inexpensive and radially available. Therefore, they provide an affordable approach to healing. So these are some wonderful reasons why Homeopathy is the best treatment option for kids. It was the 6 A.M. and we had enjoyed our homoeopathic discussion. My friends were satisfied and so that I too.

There are various great books are available to know the basics of homoeopathy. One is Homoeopathic medicine for children and infants is a great book written by Dana Ullman. In this book, he explains what is homoeopathy? How does it work? How it can be used correctly to treat common childhood aliments. He included a complete guide to the use of homoeopathy and valuable information on the important remedies that all parents have in their home medicine kit. (1)

 Homeopathy also has a great role in various mental and psychological issues apart from the routine treatment. ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), learning and behavioural problems and other psychological issues can be successfully treated with homoeopathy. Ritalin free kids is a great book written by Judith Reich Enberg-Ullman and Robert Ullman. This book explains the role of safe and effective homoeopathic medicine for ADHD, behavioural and learning problems. It offers a natural alternative to Ritalin and other harmful drugs. The authors describe their experience with more than 400 ADD patients whom they have treated. We will learn who lives have been dramatically changed and improved through the use of homoeopathy (2)

 Nowadays, homoeopathy is so well trusted. More than 300 million patients in over 80 nations are using it. As a parent and as a physician I had always observed the miraculous result of homoeopathy. Do you have an experience with the homoeopathic treatment? Do not forget to share with us, in the comment box. Until then eat healthy and live well.